Dj Invalid

Bonsoir a tes!  Je m’appele “DJ Invalid.” Et cette soiree va etre malade!

Hello party people! I’m “DJ Invalid.” And this party is going to be sick!  Let’s get ready to tuberculousis!

I don’t throw down; I throw up!

I’m so hot I got a fever! Can’t handle Tylenol for kids need the full strength kind. DJ Invalid knows how to speak in both French and English but she’s not bilingual. It’s Frenglish and she keeps the conversations on things she knows about–like prescription medicine and medical footwear.

Can you keep up with me? I like to dance from my bed because I’m really tired. I binge watch “Big Dreams, Tiny Spaces” like I just don’t care. Eat nothing but chicken soup and pretzels. Maybe I’ll read this New Yorker article about Delaware. I probably won’t eat a steak rare! Be careful of germs if you step into my lair.

Raise your hands in the air! As part of the stress test! Put your hands in this heart rate monitor! Push the buttons from here to there!

Take a pepto-bismal like its 2003. Those abdominal cramps are like the people on TV.

Okay couch potatoes DJ Invalid is out. Au revoir mon amour allez la bar! 

 

 

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