I am part of a very exclusive whatsapp group. You wouldn’t know about it. There is like a test that you need to take and I’m pretty sure you haven’t taken the test.
The test asks if you’ve ever been nominated for such distinguished positions as Most Likely to Eat Their Meal and Finish Someone Else’s at the Table. Also things like, Most Likely to Get the Fire Exit on an Airplane Because of How Skilled They Are at Flight Rescue. See, you wouldn’t qualify for these things, but I do.
That’s why I’m in the Whatsapp group with a bunch of french people. They are most notaries. I’m not sure what the word notary means but I once knew of someone who was a notary in France and then couldn’t get a job in America because the job didn’t exist. Well, that’s what my exclusive whatsapp group basically consists of.
We discuss things like “orages!” Like someone will comment that there’s been a lot of orages in Lyon and then other members of the group, while finishing up other’s meals, will have to google translate this word because they don’t know what it means (thunderstorms). This word should not be mistaken for “oranges.” Notaries are always talking about important things in French and the rest of the group doesn’t always know what they mean. Like the other people in the group, mainly Vincent and his brother, are Delta Gold Members. That’s way above just sitting in the exit row, so you can see that sometimes the group is over my head.
And, the person talking about the orages is descended from French royalty. She’s my mother in law. As you can see, I’m kind of a distinguished person.
Okay, that was the story. It wasn’t a lead up to anything; it was just a list of credentials that seemed like it was the precursor to the significant part, but that really was the entire significant part. The take away is: I’m an important person. Oh and if you’re not going to finish your lunch, I will for you. I have an award to prove it.
Also, if you feel so kind, please check out my Etsy shop. You will be getting handmade things from a decorated individual: zeta zuni shop!