Well done, France! I recently watched your new president, Emmanuel Macron, as he invited innovative Americans who are worried about climate change to come to France. You don’t have to ask me twice, EM! Allons y! Et vous allez me donner un travail, non? J’adore les forêts du Costa Rica. I just taught a class about eco-criticism. I can do this Monsieur Macron. Je peux!
I really identify with the term “innovative.” For instance, recently, I have had many highly impressive innovations:
- I innovated a paper bag into an exciting cat adventure park
- I innovated a dress my sister wore when she was 16 into an adult tank top
- I innovated a dinner conversation card game, which has such thought provoking questions as “why do men’s haircuts have a little V at the bottom?”, “why do humans have emotions?” and “how does our new understanding of tree communication influence our understanding of capitalist vs. socialist systems of rule?”
- I innovated a system where I no longer buy shampoo but instead just use all the free ones from hotels. This also goes for soap
- I innovated a paper maché bird made out of recycled newspaper by sculpting it over a stone from my sister’s garden
- I innovated an incredibly useful labeling system for all the salads at my recent pétanque party out of old art tape I had from college (oh sorry to cut you off, President Macron, you were just about to invite Vincent and me to play pétanque with you and the first lady, ah oui, I think we are available.)
- I innovated a two handled bag into a fairly comfortable (if not traveling long distances) back pack
As you can see, I think I am precisely the kind of innovative American that President Macron is looking for. None of my innovations required money. They all used recycled objects and I am very serious about climate change.
The future is not coal. It is not oil, not diesel cars. It is not new clothing, not war, not destruction of land for stupid profit. It is using our resources (the most valuable one being our minds) in a smart, effective way.
It is government incentives that encourage conservation. We can create macro (Macron!) and micro environmental change this way. We absolutely can. By using togetherness, that beautiful kind of global cooperation where we could all come together and to find ways of progressive change.
For instance, right now, Lake Ontario is flooding with clean, fresh water. This is bad for upstate New York, but if there were a way to take this water and give it to countries who could use it to improve health, then why not! Could we use this water’s power to create electricity? Could we redirect it to water the farms in upstate New York? Possibly to even make fresh water swimming pools to combat childhood obesity? Come on. There must be a way. The answer is not conflict. The answer is not showing off. It is not arrogance. It is not nuclear. It is not isolation. It is creative, communal, scientific, hope.
Oh, désolé! C’est mon téléphone avec le code pays “+33.” Ah, parfait. I should take this.